Vandals
by Anna-mathe
Summary: So we all know that when a Gargoyle is shattered when in stone form, the Gargoyle dies. But what if the Gargoyle isn't completely destroyed?
1. Vandals

So we all know that if a Gargoyle is shattered when in stone form, the Gargoyle dies.

But what if the Gargoyle isn't _entirely_ destroyed?

Vandals

Story conceived and written by Anna-mathe

"Gargoyles" and affiliated characters property of Walt Disney

The Pea Fencers in Part One belong to me, she said grudgingly

All rights reserved, for I have none.

*

Part One

The Vandals

The noon hour struck the city of New York just as it did every other day, and just as was the case every other day, various characters set aside their current tasks and turned their attention to a matter of greater importance: lunch.

            Such was not the case, however, for three particular teenage ruffians whose real names have been lost to history.  These three particulars are known only by their particular aliases: Killer T, a bumbling 16 year old with spiky orange hair and only one tooth; Betty Rue, a 15 year old obsessive Andrew Lloyd Weber fan who wore sunglasses at night and only spoke in song; and their leader, a 17 year old ruffian clad in sequined tie-dye shower thongs known only as Stinky.

            On this fine day, January 19, at this fine noon hour, these three hooligans were not concerned with lunch, no indeed.  They were fleeing desperately from the law, tracked ruthlessly for the heinous crime of selling peas without a vendor's license.  Their flight, in actuality quite futile, lead them to the top of a particular clock tower where they gained a brief respite from the chase, seeing as they'd lost their pursuers for the moment.

            "Whew!" Killer T exclaimed, flopping into a couch that was conveniently sitting in the clock tower.  "They almost got us!  I can't believe they're going so nuts over a few peas . . . "

            "Hm."  Stinky wasn't liking the turn of events.  This was too easy.  "This is too easy.  We can't stay up here – we're completely trapped.  We need to find a way out.  And deliver our next shipment of peas before the deadline."

            "Oh . . . when _is_ our next deadline, Stinky?"

            Betty Rue burst into song.

            "One more day before the storm!  One more day before the – "

            "Tomorrow."

            "Oh."

            Stinky thought.  And Stinky thought hard.  He considered himself a professional pea smuggler, and this whole situation was somewhat of an embarrassment.  So he thought, trying to come up with a way out of this predicament.

            "Oh – I think I figured out why they stopped chasing us!"

            "Why?" Killer T inquired, curious.

            "Because it's noon.  The cops probably stopped to eat.  We should have a good half hour before they come up here after us.  Everyone – try to find another way out!"

            " . . . how can I now allow this man to hold dominion over me . . . "

            "Just do it, Betty Rue."

            She hummed something under her breath and the three split up, seeking an escape and eating peas. 

            Killer T strode outside, thinking that perhaps there would be a fire escape that would go all the way down to street level, or perhaps one of those nifty platforms that window cleaners used.  So he stood along the edge of the roof, leaning against a stone gargoyle for support, glaring down.

            Futile.  No escape route there.

            "Darn it!" he exclaimed, put out, and in his anger turned and kicked the stone gargoyle in question, snapping the stone tail right off the poor stone body, the tail clunking against the rooftop and startling the young hooligan, who didn't think he'd kicked it that hard.

            "What was that?" Stinky called, rushing out with Betty Rue and staring at disbelief at the broken gargoyle.

            "Well of all things . . . can it be really?" Betty Rue wondered.

            Killer T merely shrugged.

            " . . . sorry."

            "Killer T – you're a vandal!  Granted, I fence illegitimate vegetables, but vandalism is a whole different ball game!"

            "Yeah, but . . . it was kinda fun.  I mean – look at this stone gargoyle.  Doesn't it look silly without a tail?"

            "No.  Yes.  Ho-hi.  Oh . . . _my eye_!!"

            Stinky scratched his chin and thought some more.

            "Well – we're as good as caught.  There's no way we're going to escape out of this mess unscathed . . . so we may as well have some fun before the fuzz catches us.  Heck – I dunno why they'd put gargoyles on a building like this anyway.  I mean – look at the architecture.  I think we'd be doing them all a favor."

            He turned to another stone gargoyle and, with a swift karate chop, removed the right hand.

            "Oh, what an exit!  That's how to go!"

            Betty Rue was ecstatic as she hit the floor and gnawed all the toes from another gargoyle.

            Killer T had already succeeded in removing the ears from another.

            Stinky turned his malicious gaze to the one final stone gargoyle – the one that had yet to be vandalized.  He grinned wickedly and cracked his knuckles.

            "This one's all mine . . . "


	2. Vandalized

Part Two

The Vandalized

Evening fell on the great city – the moon was already quite visible and a few stars peaked out through the smog as the sun slowly dipped down over the horizon.

            On this same clock tower, a nightly ritual was taking place – the five Gargoyles, powerful sentinels of the city, broke free of their stony prisons with a habitual roar.  The roar served two purposes.  One: to great the night with both joy and primal rage.  Two: because they liked roaring.

            One roar was cut short, however.

            Indeed, Lexington had barely broken free of his stone form before his roar turned into a startled yelp as he tumbled forward, right off the building.

            Astonished by this unusual move, Brooklyn, having been roosting next to him, instinctively grabbed to catch him with his right hand and, much to his surprise, missed.  Acting quickly, he lunged and caught Lex by the foot with his left hand, easily tossing the smaller Gargoyle back onto the roof where he again splattered forward.

            "Lex, what – "

            "I don't know!  I can't keep my balance!  It's almost like - - - - - "

            He trailed off, gawking at Brooklyn with shock and horror.

            Or rather, gawking at Brooklyn's _hands_.

            "Lex?  What?  What's wrong?"

            Confused, Brooklyn also turned his gaze to his hands, screamed like a girl, and fell over in a dead faint.

            Broadway, meanwhile, was sitting on his rump in tears.

            "My toes!!  My toes are gone!!  My _poor to-o-o-o-oes_!!!!"

            Lexington tried to get up to see if Brooklyn was all right and again splattered on his face.

            "Darn it – why can't I keep my balance?!  My – my – "

            He twisted and looked behind him.

            " – my _tail's gone_!!!!"

            Too astonished to either faint or burst into tears, he blinked and stared forward again, noting that there was a stone object inches from his face.  Curious, he picked it up and looked at it.

            " . . . oh."  He glanced back at Brooklyn, still unconscious.  "I think I just found his missing hand."

            Hudson looked at them all blankly.

            "What're ye on about, lads?  I canna hear a thing you're sain'.  Can ye speak up a bit?"

            Broadway paused in his wailing lament to regard the elder Gargoyle with concern.  He then burst back into tears.

            "My toes – and Hudson's ears – _gone, gone, goooooone_!!!"

            Hudson just blinked.

            "I told ye to _speak up_, laddie!"

            Broadway only wept louder.

            Lexington was still staring blankly at Brooklyn's stone hand.

            "Hm . . . someone must have attacked us in stone form . . . but for some reason decided not to destroy us completely . . . "

            And abruptly, the enormity of the situation finally struck him through his addled brain.

            "My tail's gone.  My . . . my _tail's gone_.  No.  No!  Not my _tail_?!?!"

            He broke into hysteric yelling and rambling, having completely flipped his gourd.

            Brooklyn moaned and sat up groggily, trying to remember what had happened.

            " . . . ugh . . . what the . . . "

            He again caught sight of his right hand, or rather, of the lack thereof, and again screamed like a girl.  Then he noted Lex rambling maniacally, still holding the stone appendage, and snatched it deftly from his rookery sibling, insanely trying to reattach it to his arm.

            "You stupid thing!!  Get back on!!!!!  You're my hand!  I need my hand!  You're a _good_ hand!!!  Get back on, you defective piece of crap!!!!  _ARGH_!!!!_  WHY WON'T YOU GO BACK ON_?!?!?!?!  _DON'T MAKE ME GET THE CATFOOD!!  YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS WHEN I GET THE CAT FOOD!!!!!_"

            Hudson blinked at the trio: Broadway bawling, Lexington raving, and Brooklyn looking plain silly.  And something clicked.

            "Brooklyn, laddie," he said in a gentle tone, "I dunno if ye noticed, but you're missin' your right hand."

            Broadway bawled louder still, Lexington began to froth at the mouth, and Brooklyn began yelling the Meow Mix theme song, trying to threaten his stone hand into submission with some dark and brutal psychological warfare tactic that only he understood.

            Goliath had been observing this scene silently, feeling a rage consume him.  A horrible rage – an all consuming rage – slowly filling him to a point he'd never known before.  Even worse than dying a helpless, defenseless death by an underhanded blow when sleeping was such a state as this: horribly defiled and left to live with the disgrace.  And to do such to these four, the last remnants of his clan, his dearest friends, his only remaining family?

            The rage filled him to the point at last where he could no longer contain it, and even as Lexington began to gnaw on his kneecaps in a rabid frenzy, his wings spread, his head fell back, and from the deepest recesses of his immense gullet rose a horrible roar – a terrible and awful challenge to all forces in the universe, a horrifying vow of vengeance upon whatever force had committed this horrible act.

            Only as he roared, something felt decidedly wrong.  Startled, he opened his eyes mid-roar and noted his clan gawking at him with blank horror, their own plights forgotten.

            Disturbed, he stopped his roar and looked at them.

            "What?" he finally said.

            And clamped a hand over his mouth.

            His _teeth_!!

            His _teeth_ were _gone_!!!!  His deadly fangs, his pearly incisors, his fear-instilling molars – all _gone_!!

            "Goliath," Hudson remarked, "ye've got no teeth."

            Goliath was too embarrassed to open his mouth to reply.

            Broadway resumed lamenting his lost toes.

            Brooklyn had, meanwhile, grabbed a can of 9 Lives from a secret hiding place and was spreading it generously on both his stone hand and the remaining portion of his wrist.

            "_Stick_, darn you!!  _Stick_!!" he demanded, trying to stick the hand back on with the gooey Turkey In Gravy Meal.

            Lexington took a deep breath, collecting his lost senses and rubbing his sore kneecaps.

            "I . . . I think Brooklyn may actually be on to something," he said after a moment, pulling himself along the rooftop to where he saw his tail laying in a corner.  "We . . . we have to put them back on!!"

            "It'll never work!!" Broadway wailed, clutching his stone toes.  "They're gone!  Gone forever!  Goooone!!"

            Hudson yelped.

            "Lads – I've got no ears!!  Why didna someone _tell_ me?!?!"

            Brooklyn gave up and licked the cat food off his wrist and hand.

            Goliath was sheepishly hiding behind a pigeon.

            "No . . . no, _really_," Lexington insisted, a plan beginning to form.  "If we wait until we're stone again, and someone reattaches the parts to us then, I think when we wake up tomorrow night, we should be back to normal."

            "You really think that could work, Lex?" Brooklyn asked in a shaky voice, staring at his hand still in shock.  "I mean . . . I thought when something happened to us when we were stone, it was irreversible."

            "Well – usually if someone attacks us, they kill us outright.  This has never happened.  We have to try it!  It might work!"

            "Hey – I'm willing to try just about anything.  Goliath, what do you think?  Goliath?  You're bigger than the pigeon.  We all see you."

            Goliath staunchly remained perfectly still, thinking this a clever ploy on Brooklyn's part to draw him out of his hiding place and into the open.  Then, however, the pigeon flew away, leaving him fully exposed.  

            The immense Gargoyle whimpered and ran inside to hide behind the couch.

            Brooklyn sighed.

            "Right . . . Lex, I sure hope this works.  But we can't do it ourselves.  Obviously.  We'll be stone.  Is Elisa coming to visit tonight?"

            "I'd think so.  It's Saturday – she always comes up on Saturdays."

            "All right.  So we wait."


	3. Waiting for Dawn

Part Three

Waiting for Dawn

Elisa sat in a comfy chair, mouth hanging open in shock, as she absorbed the tale before her.  Or the lack thereof, in Lexington's case.  (Tale, tail – close enough, fussy!)

            Brooklyn and Lex finished relating their plan, Lex sprawled on the floor in the clock tower, still unable to keep his balance with a missing appendage, and Brooklyn noticeably keeping his right arm behind his back.

            Broadway sat in a corner, still bawling, Goliath was still trying to hide behind the couch, and Hudson was wondering why no one would talk to him.

            Elisa finally shook herself, forcing her startled mind to work properly.

            "I don't understand who could have done this!" she exclaimed.  "It's hard enough to get up here as it is – and besides, no one knows you live here!  How and why.  I wonder.  Hm."

            "Elisa," Brooklyn pleaded, kneeling before her in proper begging position (except that instead of his hands being folded in pleading mode, one hand held onto the stump of the other), "please help us!!  As soon as the sun rises, you need to some how put us back together!  It's the only chance we have!!  We can't go on living like _this_ – that would be silly!!!"

            Detective Maza looked down into those earnest, desperate, pleading eyes and sighed.

            "Of course I'll try to help you, Brooklyn.  I'm just . . . startled that this happened, that's all.  Do you . . . have any thoughts as to _how_ I should . . . euh . . . put you back together?"

            Brooklyn blinked, shrugged, and turned to Lexington.

            " . . . well, two options come to mind," the clever little Gargoyle stated.  "Krazy Glue, or Fluffer Nutter."

            Elisa frowned.

            "I outright refuse to be seen buying anything with the name Fluffer Nutter.  You guys hang tight – I'll go get some Krazy Glue.  Make sure you all have all your pieces!"

            "Good point," Lexington agreed, throwing a dirty look at Broadway, who was still weeping uselessly.

            Elisa left them then to deal with their dilemma and headed for the local CVS.  Not only did she know they carried the glue in question, but she'd heard that they still had clearance Christmas Candy in stock, and was hoping to load up on Santa-shaped gumdrops.

            Brooklyn looked at Lex and sighed.

            "Well, since I'm the only one who still has both mobility and my wits, I guess I should go collect Goliath's teeth . . . "

            A whine came from behind the couch.

            "Aw, grow up."

            Lex grimaced as Brooklyn left the room to pick up missing Gargoyle pieces and turned to Broadway.

            "Broadway . . . it's okay, buddy.  Stop crying."

            " . . . my poor toes . . . "

            "Do you have them all?  Do you have all of your toes, or are some missing?  Broadway, do you have all of your toes?"

            " . . . my toes . . . "

            Lexington sighed.

            "Brooklyn!" he called.  "Make sure there aren't any spare toes laying around, too!"

            Hudson was glaring evilly at the TV.

            "I canna hear a word they're sayin'!!" he yelled, outraged.

            "You don't have any ears, Hudson."

            " . . . "  Hudson, having not heard the reply, didn't say anything.

            Brooklyn came back in carrying a set of teeth and a toe in his hand and two ears wrapped up in his tail.

            "I think this is everything.  You have your tail.  My hand is on the couch.  Broadway has the rest of his toes.  Elisa's getting the glue.  What now?"

            "Now?" Lexington repeated, baffled.  "I . . . can't think of anything else."

            "Hm."  Brooklyn flopped onto the couch next to his hand.  "Then all we can do is wait for dawn.  That's a long way away."

            "Well, we can't exactly go on patrol when we're like _this_."

            "I know.  We need to kill time."  He sighed and grabbed another can of cat food from another secret place.  "Hungry?"

            "Um . . . no."

            A long awkward silence fell over the clock tower, broken only by the blaring television, Broadway's wailing, and Goliath's perpetual whining.

            Finally, Brooklyn cleared his throat.

            "Um . . . wanna play twenty questions?"

            "Sure, why not."

            "Right – you go first."

            "Okay – are you wood?"

            "No."

            "Are you stone?"

            "No."

            "Are you metal?"

            "No."

            "Are you dairy?"

            " . . . yeah."

            "Are you cheese?"

            " . . . yeah."

            "Brooklyn, are you a slice of provolone?"

            " *sigh*  Yeah."

            Another long awkward silence.

            "Lex?"

            "Yeah?"

            "This is gonna be a long night."

            "I think you're right."

            Elisa then came bounding back up into the clock tower.

            "Hey, guys!  I'm back!  I got the glue – and some hollow milk chocolate snowmen!"

            Broadway sniffled, but looked up with cognizance for the first time that night.

            " . . . hollow . . . milk . . . chocolate . . . . . . . . . snowmen?"

            Elisa smiled gently, handing a box to him.

            "Eat all you like, big guy!" she suggested.  "You'll feel better."

            She turned and tapped Hudson on the shoulder, giving him a box as well.

            "Aye!  I didna hear ye come in, lass!  Been here long?"

            "No, I just got back."

            "I said, been here long?"

            Elisa sighed and turned to Lex and Brooklyn.

            "So?"

            They shrugged.

            "We have all our pieces," Brooklyn said, pointing to where they'd put all the pieces (except for Broadway's toes, which he was still clinging to) in little piles.  "We just need to wait for dawn."

            Elisa made a face.

            "Yeah – I can see how that would be rough.  Chocolate snowman?"

            "Please."

            She gave them each a box of hollow milk chocolate snowmen, then carefully crept behind the couch to confront Goliath.

            "Goliath . . . "

            The big one whined and took off, dashing outside to find another pigeon to hide behind.  She took off right after him.

            "Goliath, wait!  You don't need to hide from me!  I – I understand, I really do!  C'mon, Goliath!  You know me better than to think I'd judge you just because you don't have any teeth!!"

            A mournful howl arose outside.

            Elisa sighed, shaking her head.

            "Lost cause.  So what're you two planning on doing all night?"

            Lex and Brooklyn again shrugged.

            "Cat food?" Brooklyn offered politely.

            Elisa politely declined.  Instead, she offered a suggestion.

            "Let's play twenty questions!"

            Brooklyn groaned and wrapped his wings completely around him so no one could see his face.

            "Okay!" Lex agreed.  "You go first."

            "Are you mammal?"

            "No."

            "Reptile?"

            "No."

            "Amphibian?"

            " . . . yes."

            "Are you a fish?"

            "Yes."

            "Freshwater?"

            "Yes."

            "Lexington, are you a trout?"

            "Yep."

            "Hm."


	4. Reconstruction

Part Four

Reconstruction

The sky was slowly shifting from the deepest blue to an enticing blend of gold and pink as the Gargoyles crept outside their lair to the open rooftop.

            Broadway, who'd stopped crying after eating 12 chocolate snowmen, took his place silently with what little bit of dignity he'd retained.

            Hudson looked around, taking the next place.

            "Aye – it's nearly mornin', lads!  Why didna someone tell me?"

            Elisa looked at them and shook her head.

            Lexington blinked at her, taking the next space very carefully so as not to fall off again.

            "Promise you'll try to glue everything on as straight as possible?"

            She smiled and put her hands on his shoulders.

            "Lex, I'll do my best.  I promise you that."

            He sighed and tried to look brave.

            She moved on to Brooklyn, who was regarding his companions with rigid concern.

            "Elisa . . . you know this may not work?  We may be stuck like this forever?"

            "And what if you are?"

            He sighed deeply.

            "I don't know.  I don't know how we'll function.  I mean – Lex could adjust to a new balance, Goliath could get dentures, and Broadway could get some shoes.  Hudson could learn sign language.  What about me?  I'm missing a stinking _hand_!"

            "Brooklyn," Elisa said gravely, "even without your right hand, you'll always be Goliath's right hand man.  Er – Gargoyle."

            He sniffled.

            "Well . . . whether or not it works, thanks for helping."

            "Any time, Brooklyn.  Although I still refuse to ever be seen purchasing Fluffer Nutter."

            "Can't say that I blame you."

            Elisa blinked and moved on to Goliath, who was bundled up in a tight ball, hiding his face.

            "Goliath – you need to turn to stone with your mouth open.  Otherwise, I won't be able to glue your teeth back in."

            He glowered at her darkly.

            "Really, Goliath!  This is the only way!  If you don't open your mouth, you'll never have teeth again!!"

            He whimpered faintly and looked over at the horizon.

            The sun peaked over the skyline.

            And he opened his mouth just as he froze into stone.

            Elisa sighed, looking at the stone teeth she held in her hand.

            " . . . this is actually pretty disgusting . . . "

            And so, when the following night came and the sun dropped over the edge of visibility, the five Gargoyles were waiting, each restored to his former glory with the aid of a human and a tiny bottle of Krazy Glue.

            Each broke through his stone prison, but none let out the customary waking roar.  All were too concerned about what state they'd wake up in . . . 

            Brooklyn didn't dare look at first, but after a few seconds of suspense, he gritted his teeth and raised his arms . . .

            . . . to find both hands happily attached and healthy!

            "WEEEEEEE!!" he whooped, leaping from the tower and performing a series of ecstatic aerial loops before crashing into a Whiz Bang.

            "My tail!" Lexington exclaimed, joyful.

            "My toes!" Broadway sang, ecstatic.

            "Aye, lads – ye've finally decided to start talkin' again, eh?"

            Elisa, standing in the shadows all this time, strode forward and looked up at Goliath.

            "Well?"

            He looked back down at her and smiled.

            Showing all his teeth in their proper places.

The End


End file.
